This is going to be one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. One of my best friends on this Earth is preparing to leave. I am heartbroken and devastated. Here are my last words to you my friend. I hope you see this or someone reads it to you.
I remember when we first met, we instantly realized we were exactly alike. Our friendship took off right away. I remember telling you that I wanted my hair colored in a way you weren’t sure you could do. I told you I trusted you just do it. You were hesitant but we decided worst case scenario, we had to do something else. It turned out awesome and your creative hair coloring ideas took off and became very popular. I was so proud of you. You have had no fear in this life. That has been one of my favorite qualities you possess.
We spent many afternoons in your salon complaining and venting about life. We laughed and poked fun of ourselves and each other. It has been all out of love for each other.
We decided we were Thelma and Louise. We laughed so hard at the idea but it stuck. Remember when we both found the same necklaces and shirts separately? Ironically, I bought the shirts and you bought the necklaces to surprise each other. We laughed and laughed because we knew we were indeed destined to be those characters.
The time we went together to advocate for changes in suicide laws at the Capitol was one of my favorite days we spent together. You had no fear busting right into the representatives and Senators offices. You helped me gain some alot of self confidence that day. I was really nervous because I was scheduled to speak on the floor. You talked me into being unafraid because I know my stuff then it got changed and I didn’t have to do it. I was disappointed instead of relieved. I thank you for that.
We had a great time the night we did our Christmas plates. It was awful because the light quit working and we could barely see but we made the best of it and it was one great night. We laughed our butts off and I saw Cat really relax and have fun… we have been family to each other. You have accepted me unconditionally and supported me through some of my hardest times the past few years.
You and I added Cat and Pam to our crazy little world. I gained two more amazing friends through you. We had a ball those afternoons together. The day we did the cancer hoodies and I promised no pictures then took them anyway. Dena B. was with us as well and everyone wanted to hang me out to dry but that was a day we all stood together as one in your fight. We didn’t know then but that was the beginning of the end as much as I hate to admit it. My heart breaks for you because I have beat that monster twice and you are a much better person than I. You haven’t deserved this battle. I would take your place in a New York minute if I could.
I love you my friend, my sister, my Louise to Thelma. Life is not going to be the same without you. Cat and I cried today. Pam and I cried today….the thought we were suddenly on such borrowed time and knowing we couldn’t see you was killing us. I don’t want to see you at your funeral. I want our afternoons and times together not to end. I know how you have fought, struggled and suffered so much but I am selfish and cannot stand the thought of you leaving.
As you know all too well, I am not good at goodbyes so I won’t say it. Until I see you again, I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I love you.
More Love. Less Hate. H
I own no copy rights to this song in any way.